A Very Johnson Christmas

I decided to go back to New Mexico for christmas this year. Needless to say, I don't like going back for any reason except to hang out with my brother and sister. I figure this should be good because great stories happen when I'm with my siblings. Here's the haps:

1) Christmas Day: My brother, sister, and I go to a gathering of family member on my dad's side, whom we haven't seen in a long time. It's time to get reaquainted. It was the classics extended version party, Aunts getting crazy weird and screaming louder than the kids, cousins and cousins-in-law making fun of everyone, a very 'Rez' game of Scattergories as only 'Injuns' can conjour up, and tons and tons of food. It was great. After spending time with them, we went over to another cousins house that live two houses away and play a few hours of video games. Also very cool...except when the game is Mario cart, then it gets vicious. And after these fun filled hours, we went to the Roger's (this is the family that my sister and I lived with for a year) and spent the remaining part of the day with them. So we hit 3 houses on Christmas Day....not too shabby.

2) My brother and sister had to work most of the time, and I had no real ties to anyone or anything down there, so what is a boy to do............. Watch movies, lots and lots of movies: (in the order watched)
a) the Missing
b) Resident Evil
c) Queen of the Damned
d) the Craft
e) Better Luck Tomorrow
f) Blade 2
g) Star Wars: Episode 2
h) Life is Beautiful
i) Amelie
j) Victory

and also a little bit of Jimmy Neutron and Pirates of the Caribbean.
Yeah, I'm productive with my time.

3) My sister and I decided to go shopping for stuff we wanted...and my sister knows people. Our first stop was Hot Topic. We got 40% off of anything we wanted and I got a free hoodie because they forgot to scan it. And I got my Hot Topic card filled out, so I have 15% off my next visit.
Next we went to Best Buy. My sister works there and she can get stuff at the cost the store gets them, no mark up what-so-ever. I made off with 3 new DVDs. Then onward to Baskin Robbins for 1 free scoop of ice cream each. My sister also worked here and knows the people there too. Cool, huh ? It was a free stuff week.

4) The only really sucky thing was that my friend/cousin got into an arguement that was totally dumb and we haven't spoken in a few days. It's all good though. Just one of those things.

5) I got Hulk Hands for christmas.

It was a good Christmas.

Taking test, especially finals, make me realize how greatful I am for:

1) Mechanical Pencils
2) Big erasers
3) Dr. Pepper
4) my TI-89
5) book buybacks
6) food (a stress reliever)
7) DDR (another stress reliever)

If it weren't for finals, well....I would still love all of these things, I just would be without the headache.

I got stopped in the Bookstore today while walking through the detectors. It has never happened before. I would walk through, the alarm would go off and they would just wave me through. But today, it was different. I had to show and scan my bag, my textbooks, and my CD player. When all was said and done, I was allowed to WALK through the computer part of the store. Never before in my career as a BYU undergrad have I ever seen anyone told to empty their bag when they go throught the bookstore. What was so different about this time?!? I wasn't embarassed or anything, but just a little perturbed because that is not how I wanted to spend 2 minutes of my existance. I think BYU is getting paranoid. Maybe I should give them a reason to check everyone's bags.

Let's join the conversation already in progress.....

"Yay,..." - Master Steve
"J.Po" - JayPo

Yah, we got the son of a b says:
watching fellowship of the ring
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
"there is one who could reunite them"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
"one who could reclaim the throne of gondor"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
"steven humpherys"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
elrond: "he's too expensive"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
elrond: "we can't afford him"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
gandalf: "but we must have him"
J.Po says:
i'm too expensive, an expensive assassin
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
elrond: "we'll get Jay, he's cheap"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
gandalf: "we want to beat sauron, right?"
J.Po says:
elrond:" that's why we need jay. He always gets the job done."
J.Po says:
elrond: "I hear he is the best."
J.Po says:
gandalf:"It's true."
J.Po says:
elrond: "We don't need Frodo anymore, now that we have Jay."
J.Po says:
gandalf: "We can all rest, now that Jay is on the case."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
gandalf: "well frodo's a pansy anyway"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
gandalf: "but we must have steve"
J.Po says:
elrond: "Steve is a pansy too. He'll only hold up the journey."
J.Po says:
gandalf:"Then we should kill him."
J.Po says:
elrond: "Yes."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
elrond: "we can't. he's too powerful. he makes sauron look like a kitty cat"
J.Po says:
pippen: "I want to push this little button on this nuclear type....thing....just to see what it does."
J.Po says:
Sam: "I'm hungery."
J.Po says:
Frodo: "Sam. You just ate an hour ago."
J.Po says:
Sam:" I know, mr. frodo. But I'm hungery again."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
Sam: "shut up frodo. or i'll stop cooking for you. you can eat with gollum."
J.Po says:
Gollum: "Smeeeegol. Why do you cry Smeagol?"
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "The nasty hobbits are going to eat me."
J.Po says:
Gollum: "They hates you."
J.Po says:
Smeagol:"they are my friendsss."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
steve: "everybody hates jay"
J.Po says:
Gollum: "They are not your friendsss. Steve is your only friend."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "STEVE!!! STEVE IS A F***IN F***."
J.Po says:
Gollum:" But he likes you."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "I HATES STEVE..."
J.Po says:
Gollum: "Steve hatesss you."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "nasty steve."
J.Po says:
Gollum: "Maybe 'she' will kill steve."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
steve hates spiders
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
he will kill her
J.Po says:
Gollum:"She is tricksey."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "I need some Mountain Dew: code Red."
J.Po says:
Gollum: "Let's steal some."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
gandalf: "i need some wassail"
J.Po says:
elrond: "I need some lovin."
J.Po says:
elrond: "I haven't got any lovin since I was 1000 years old."
J.Po says:
elrond: "When you bought me that wench from Brandybuck."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
arwen: "don't talk about mom that way"
J.Po says:
elrond: "It's true....."
J.Po says:
elrond: "you can just accept the truth."
J.Po says:
elrond: "I..am..your father."
J.Po says:
Leia: "Does that make Arwen and I sisters ?!?"
J.Po says:
elrond: "NO !!! but I can be your sugardaddy."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
neo: "not after i kill you"
J.Po says:
elrond: "MR. ANDERSON !!!"
J.Po says:
Gollum: "I hatessss the matrix."
J.Po says:
Sabe': "I love Steve."
J.Po says:
Trinity: "Sabe', I'm going to kick your @$$."
J.Po says:
Padme': "Not if I have anything to say about it."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "cool, catfight"
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
this is getting to be a cool movie
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "I haven't seen on of these in ages."
J.Po says:
Arwen: "I'm going to mess u up, Leia, you stole my last Diet Coke."
J.Po says:
Leia: "Bring it BiT*H!!"
J.Po says:
Legolas: "Captain Jack Sparrow !!! Go get some chips and get back here quick!!"
J.Po says:
Capt. Jack Sparrow: "Savy !!!"
J.Po says:
Frodo: "To the winner gets the One Ring."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "Let's get it on !!"
J.Po says:
Neo: "Trinity, if you need me just think of my name. "
J.Po says:
Trinity: "I don't need your help. I can take all of them."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "Talkie talkie talkie....no more talkie."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "This had better be a good, clean fight. No scratching the eyes, bullettime kicks, or biting any pointed ears."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
Mike tyson: "no fair"
J.Po says:
Sam: "I'm hungry, Where's Captain Jack with those 'taters."
J.Po says:
Captain Jack: "I'm here but there's no rum..... Sabe' burned it all."
J.Po says:
Sabe':"Rum is a vile drink."
Yah, we got the son of a b says:
Pippen: "damn Sabe, I want a pint"
J.Po says:
Luke Skywalker: "Beat her good, sis, She burned all the rum."
J.Po says:
Leia: "It will be my pleasure."
J.Po says:
Legolas: "I just need Lamdas bread salsa and I'm good."
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "Taters?!? what be taters, precioussss?!?"
J.Po says:
Sam: "Po-tay-toes!!"
J.Po says:
Neo: "Where did you pick up this guy?!?"
J.Po says:
Frodo: "He's our guide!!"
J.Po says:
Neo: "Not much too look at is he ?!?"
J.Po says:
Sam: "Not really, but he has an excellent singing voice."
J.Po says:
Trinity: "STOP PULLING MY HAIR, ARWEN!!"
J.Po says:
Arwen: "YOU STARTED IT!!!"
J.Po says:
Trinity: "NO I DIDN'T !!! PADME' DID !!!"
J.Po says:
Padme': "YOU SUCK!! I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!!"
J.Po says:
R2: "beep bop beep"
J.Po says:
C3PO: "Artoo says first round is over."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "Shut that infernal thing off, or I'm going to crush that piece of metal with my muntant abilities."
J.Po says:
C3-PO: "...but sir..."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "That does it. "
J.Po says:
C3-PO: "AAAAARRRRRR!!!!!"
J.Po says:
Luke: "What are you doing to my droid."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "I'm turning him into a coffee mug."
J.Po says:
Legolas: "Captain Jack, You need a new mug."
J.Po says:
Captain Jack: "Savy!!"
J.Po says:
Frodo: "I want a mug too."
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "there's another droid. I can do it."
J.Po says:
Sabe': "OW !!!!!"
J.Po says:
Leia: "Hang on Sabe'. GET OFF HER TRINITY !!"
J.Po says:
Trinity: "Skank!!"
J.Po says:
Arwen: "whore!!"
J.Po says:
Aragorn: "Did I miss anything ?!? Sorry I'm late, I couldn't park my submarine anywhere."
J.Po says:
Sam: "they just started...did you bring the 'tater chips?!?"
J.Po says:
Smeagol: "Again with the tater's. Enough with the Taters!!"
J.Po says:
Gandalf: (calling on his cell phone) "Charles !! You're missing it, old friend !!!"
J.Po says:
Neo: "Call the oracale. She makes great cookies."
J.Po says:
Legolas: "Where'd Gimli go?!?"
J.Po says:
Aragorn: "I saw him on the street, drunk of his @$$ again..."
J.Po says:
Legolas: "I was going to tell him that I'm up to 17 shots now..."
J.Po says:
Charles: "Are they still fighting ?!?"
J.Po says:
Gandalf: "They are getting tired."
J.Po says:
Charles: "ALMOST TIRED ?!? ENGAGE !!!!!"
J.Po says:
Frodo: "I'm tired. I"m going back to the Prancing Pony."
J.Po says:
Sam: "I"m going to come with you."
J.Po says:
Aragorn: "I'm glad they are gone. They were eating all the chips. "
J.Po says:
Gollum: "Stupid Fat Hobbitsesss."

Yah, we got the son of a b says:
cool J.Po
J.Po says:
lol
J.Po says:
i rather enjoyed it

It is in production and will be released in 2005. Look for it at your local theatre.

Some thoughts that should be thought about but really have no weight in reality and are not going to change the world:

1) I think people spend too much time watching the stock market and stewing over how much money they have lost. Have they really 'lost money' ?!? My answer to that is 'NO', because it's all on paper. There was really no loss of anything that was physical. What they 'lost' today may be regained tomorrow, depending on how many shoes were sold in Indonesia and how good their broker is feeling. The stock market is a good idea, but it leads to some bad ends. There were people that I've tracted into that would rather sit around their house all day and watch the little bar on the bottom of their screen scroll by then go out and enjoy the day or read a book. What was really lost was time. I admit that I watch the stock market and I have reason to but not on the scale that most people do. I go about my day, go to school, play DDR, read a book, and then occasionally I'll check to see where I ended at the end of the day. Granted, on paper I gained pennies, but that's not worth me sitting around all day watching CNN or CNBC waiting for the final bell to ring or even watch the after bell trading. I was semi-excited when the Dow rose over 50 points in a day 2 summers ago, but the next day, people started selling and it went back down. I think people should be aware where the economy is going, but not to the extent that it's an obsessive thing. I fear stock people because they are too paranoid/ too impulsive. My boss for the satellite company I worked for was a stock guy and how he felt for the rest of the day was dependant on where the market was. I try to avoid them now. But really, people spend too much time and expend too much effort watching the stock market.

2) Orange soda is one of the greatest inventions in the world. I reciently purchased a case of orange soda and I wanted to drink all of it that same day. But I had to ration it because I wanted to prolong the experience. Whoever came up with the idea for orange soda, I salute you. Shaa-wing!!!!

3) Finals week has got to be the single most depressing/ stressful/ exciting/ bowel moving/ drug taking week of the entire year....well that and tax time. But, seriously, college aged and, sometimes high school aged, people around the nation go through the same feelings of anxiety and self-doubt at the same time. Chemical use increases whether it be caffeine, Prozac, or Buspar. I don't know where I'm going with this one, but I felt like stating a truth....and no I'm not on drugs.

4) I need a Mickey in my corner. The kind of Mickey that know the in's and out's of everything. When it's time to take the big test or to ask a girl out, Mickey is right there to pump me up and give me words of encouragement. Then he kicks me to the middle of the ring and yell profanities at me trying to keep me motivated. That would be great. I'm in the testing center and Mickey is outside in the lobby and his angery, old guy voice resounds throughout the building telling me to keep going. Or when I'm playing DDR, Mickey is there to keep up the intensity. Then when the time to perform is done, Mickey is there to hand me a towel, give me some water and tell me to hit the showers. He needs to look like Burgess Meredith too. I don't think I could be motivated from by someone who looked like Paulie (Burt Young). He didn't do a good job when Rocky fought Mr.T the first time. Only Mickey would do.

5) Cell phones are good when used properly and in the appropriate time. But people base too much of their effort in cell phones. As I write this, there is a girl with her cell phone yakking away in what should be a quiet area. Breaking silence in a place that should be quiet is not kosher and should be punished. People driving and talking on their cell phones is also against the rules. People aren't driving, they are talking. Their concentration is somewhere other than driving. People around here can't drive good enough anyway, we don't need cell phones to 'bring down the average'. I liken cell phone drivers to that kid in class who shows up and screws around during class, doesn't learn a d**n thing, takes the final and drags down the average and the curve. I like playing with cell phones and I like a lot of people who have cell phones. I just don't think people know how to use them correctly. Maybe I should write the book on cell phone usage: when, where, why, and how (especially how the silent mode is enabled).

6) Spiderman is real.